Surviving Soberly

In August 1981 having spent the summer being subjected to more of my dad's sexual abuse and having kept my sister Cindy updated the whole time as to the progression of his behavior, she and I went to a church agency in hopes of getting some help. It was called AGAPE and it was a foster child placement agency where Church of Christ members take in abused and/or neglected children temporarily, sometimes leading to a permanent placement later. Although my sister and I had attended this particular church a few years earlier, we were not currently members but had no other resources at our disposal. Having made the call to Cindy that summer day telling her that things with my dad had escalated to the point where I was in fear for my life and terrified that he was going to cross the line to intercourse with me, she and I now sat in the small lobby of AGAPE and waited to talk to a counselor. Numerous pictures lined the halls and walls in the building of happy families with their ch...

By Terri Rimmer I t was 35 years ago this month, two months before my sixteenth birthday my mom placed me in a juvenile delinquent home for girls which was housed in a private home in a regular neighborhood. There were five other girls besides me, all with histories of behavior problems or their parents simply didn't want them. The house at 2877 Chapel Hill Road in Douglasville, Georgia was made of cedar wood and giant Brown Recluse spiders used to hang out in the rafters outside which I found out later much to my horror. One crazy roommate I had thought it'd be cute once to put one of these creatures on my bed. The Cobb Douglas Girls Group Home, which has since been torn down to make way for a four-lane road, which I recently found out much to my pleasure, was once located on a two-lane road in a nice subdivision. Now there are no houses there and 20 years ago a mall was built nearby. The first time I met the residents and staff before moving in, my mom and I were...

November 23, 2016 Dear McKenna, Yes, we're on your 16 th annual Thanksgiving letter. There are many things I'm thankful for this year and you are at the top of my list. I made a gratitude list in my head yesterday and, of course, I couldn't help but think of you as I do every day. When people find out about my adoption choice, they always ask questions, which to me are silly, but I guess to them are not. Things like: Do I love you? Do I think about you? And, you know the answers to both of these questions is “Absolutely.” It's been a good year. You are my inspiration, my muse, my heart. I love your sense of humor, what makes you you, everything about you. Most of all I love that you have had such a great life and you have a wonderful life ahead of you. I'm so glad that Vicki and Larry are raising you. It has always comforted me. I always love hearing about the things you are doing, funny thing...

Remember my friend from college whose teenage daughter was in a bad wreck from texting and driving a month ago? Well, she got out of the hospital. They sent her home with a wheelchair and a walker and she'll be going through physical therapy. My friend wanted me to spread the word via a pic of the car and get the message out about not texting and driving. The police said her daughter was lucky to be alive.

August 6, 2016 Dear McKenna, You turning 16 soon brings us to another annual birthday letter. You will turn Sweet 16 on Aug. 15 and get your license on the same day – a huge turning point in your life, a stepping stone that is a huge responsibility and a privilege. You are such a good driver, much better than I was! And I'm proud also of the person you have become so far. You're so smart, mature, ambitious, talented, and curious. I get teary-eyed when I think of how everything has developed up until now. I remember reading about all your milestones through the years and seeing your pictures up till now, marveling at my little girl, emailing friends and family those emails and pictures, scanning photos. I have framed so many pictures, made photo albums, often gone back over baby pictures, finding it hard to believe that so many years have gone by so quickly yet not so quickly. I still have the “McKenna Walls” that you saw so long ago when you were ten o...

In between watching the Olympics opening ceremonies I was watching the Kitten Olympics on the Hallmark Channel which were hilarious. They played volleyball, bad minton, and track, and the cameras visited the kittens with their activities in the dorms. Then they did synchronized napping where they had to keep their eyes closed. Whoever did got the gold. The judges said, "Oh, looks like Team North just can't keep their eyes closed." So the brown and white tabby Team South won. "And Team South kills it to bring home the gold." It's going to be on for a few nights with other events. They have a couple of real Olympic judges doing the commentary. A couple of cats are named Purrcules and Nadia Come n' Scratch Me. They all have Olympic names combined with cat names. no plus ones Yeah, I really do need to start that dating thing again.

Growing up in a middle-class family in the 70s we never wanted for anything. There was steak on the grill every Saturday night, parties in the basement, big meals at holidays, breakfast on the electric griddle at the kitchen table, plenty of Halloween candy and we never went hungry. Mom always shopped heartily and Dad always brought us treats and took us to ice cream and pizza parlors on weekends. At the movies we always got popcorn, candy, and Coke. The money seemed endless. Mom was a tightwad and Dad was a spendthrift. He always bought people things but never himself. He’d have the same clothes and shoes falling apart for years but everyone had everything they wanted for Christmas. We lived in a three-bedroom house with a basement, attic, and garage, washer and dryer, decent furniture, Dad had a workshop in the basement, we had a swing set and sandbox in the large backyard, a new driveway. We had two cars. Dad always decorated the house lavishly at Christmas and once when I h...